I know what you mean. It would be nice to have some of the key (worst) things at the ready if someone asked.

Kinda wanted to do something similar with the Pine Phone + Keyboard, but I can’t seem to find the right OS/distro for the task.

I think Anubis would be able to prevent that. Sopuli uses it

Even through duck.ai?

I feel as if we’re at that Scrubs reference

LibRedirect works for me

Aren’t some companies thinking of releasing TVs that won’t work unless connected to the internet?